2. The Unrequited love poem: How do you feel when you love someone who does not love you back?
First of all, this is not going to be a poem. Because love is hard enough to talk about without having to worrying about how things rhyme or about each stanza. I think Olivia Wilde said it best in one of her roles when she said, “The problem with heartbreak is that to you it’s like an atomic bomb, and to the world its just really cliché because in the end we all have the same experience.”
Because that’s what it feels like. Instead of having hearts we all just walk around with bombs inside of our chests, and one day you meet someone, a complete stranger, and for whatever cosmic reason they hold the detonator.
They say, or do something, or they never give themselves the chance to love you in the first place. Then all of a sudden everything collapses inside of you, but your outward shell remains intact. Talking about it makes me cringe, which is surprising since I have spent a great deal of breath talking about my relationship woes in the past. That is where the cliché part enters.
We sit around with friends over glasses of wine, bowls of ice cream and recall what it felt like to be unloved, and eventually people on the outside listening get a little tired of being reminded of pain. For your own health they want you to stop talking about it.
I think what is even worse than someone you love not loving you is when two people do love each other, and in the end it doesn’t work, or it turns out that the other person who said they loved you doesn’t actually know how to love you. The most difficult reality to face sometimes is not always heartbreak. It is the realization that love is not always enough. All of it hurts. It hurts so badly that for a time you think you will stop breathing.
Heartbreak is one of those things that only time can heal and the moment it occurs you just wish someone could have already invented the time machine so you can hop inside and fast forward through it. You like to think that this will be the last time you will feel like this but my dad shattered that illusion when he took me a side after I had been wallowing for a few days and said, “this will probably not be the last time this happens to you, but this is life.” Extremely uplifting, I know. But as difficult as it is to hear it’s not wrong.
The bravest thing I know how to do is love. Love fully, with my whole being. There is nothing more terrifying then loving those around you because we’re all just so fragile. But the reward of experiencing love makes it worth it. Well, at least on most days. Ask me tomorrow and I may have a different, slightly more cynical answer for you. As much as I have been hurt and disappointed by unrequited love, loves that have let me down, love that could not stand the test of time, I’m honestly thankful to have experienced them all. My life has been much richer because of it, and I hope that whoever reads this can say the same thing.